F.A.Q. To Killing Yourself

1. Is it best to handwrite or to type your suicide note.

It depends. How is your handwriting? The personal touch of a handwritten note is often much appreciated by the family members who read it, assuming your family actually cares enough for you to do so. If you’re putting blame on someone for this suicide then make sure you write their name clearly. You don’t want to chance them skipping over this important detail since what’s the use in killing yourself if you can’t make the source of your misery feel like a murderer.


2. I’m having second thoughts, is this life still worth living?

Absolutely not.

3. I’m a bit overweight, will the rope still hold?

Perhaps, though contingency planning is advised. Perhaps place a bed of knives below you just incase.

4. Is killing yourself really considered a sin?
Unfortunately, yes. Though so is the molestation of young boys, so don’t fret. There’s room up there for everyone. Worst comes to worst, you’ll be reunited with your father.

6. I’m in a lot of pain and I’ve heard about something called Euthanasia. Could you elaborate?

I already told you, i'm not well informed on Chinese kids.

7. What is the deal assisted suicide is it any less painful?No less painful then your current existence.

8. My parents don’t love me, is this the answer?
Probably. Yes.